Life in the Smash Mansion
by David Noklevername
Summary: Stories from the Smash Mansion! Covering such topics as shipping, badasses, and who ate Samus' mushrooms!


Life in the Smash Mansion

Episode One: Samus' Mushroom Caper!

Starring: Ness, Kirby, and Samus!

You probably know the Smash all, it is one of the most known Super Smash Bros. fan fiction cliches! Though I'm here to tell you a story, un-creatively taking place there...

"KIRBY!" Samus Aran screamed from the Smash Mansion's kitchen, "GET DOWN HERE RIGHT NOW!"

The Pink Puffball rolled down the stairs. "What is it, Samus?" He asked, with a smile on his round face.

"DID YOU EAT MY MUSHROOMS?!" She yelled.

"No!" Kirby replied, "I didn't even know we had any... Next time, tell me so I can be here early!"

"Be here early to do what, exactly?"

"... Do the dishes so we can have forks?" Kirby lied, "We never have forks. Of course, that doesn't bother me. I don't even know what a fork IS!" Kirby laughed.

Samus stared at Kirby, "Well, unless you can find WHO ate my Mushrooms, I'll be seeing you in the arena tomorrow..."

"Which arena?"

"Planet Zebes."

Kirby gasped. The place scared Kirby. It's name isn't even a pun! "Alright, Samus..."

Samus nodded, "All right. Now go to your room, it's past your bed time!" Samus pointed to the stairs, which Kirby went up.

When Kirby get's into his room, he sits on a box next to his bed. His PONDERING BOX!

"Now, who could possibly of eaten Samus' Mushrooms..." He pondered. Kirby was then knocked off his PONDERING BOX by a pillow.

"What's wrong, Kirby?" His room mate, Ness, asked, "When someone narrates to themself, they usually have a problem."

"... You were about to say 'in the head' after that, weren't you?" Kirby asked.

"I did," Ness answered.

"In your head?" Kirby asked.

"In my head!" Ness answered. They both rolled around laughing, "So, what's your problem?"

"Samus Aran said I ate her Mushrooms but I didn't!" Kirby complained, "So now I have to find who did or she's gonna beat me up!"

"Alright!" Ness yelled, "Let's look for who did it!"

The duo walked into the Mario Bros. Room. Ness bursted in, yelling "YOOOOU!"

"What's-a the problem?" Mario asked, rubbing his eyes.

"WE KNOW YOU ATE SAMUS' MUSHROOMS!" Ness yelled.

"... What he said!" Kirby added, helpfully.

"No, I-a didn't!" Mario objected.

"OBJECTION!" Ness replied, "You constantly eat Mushrooms!"

"I've stopped since your constant jokes about me becoming 'big' when I eat them started getting annoying."

"I know who ate the Mushrooms!" Luigi said.

"Looks like we've ran into a dead end, Ness!" Kirby sighed.

"I saw him do it." Luigi told everyone.

"Well, let's GO!" Ness yelled.

"... Nobody is listening, are they?" Luigi asked himself.

Ness and Kirby left the room, Ness tripping over a box, in the hallway for some reason...

Ness gasped, "I'VE FIGURED IT OUT!" Ness yelled at Kirby.

"YAY!" Kirby cheered, "Who did it?"

"I'll tell you, but not now!"

"Alright, but why?"

"Because I want to pad out the chapter's length!"

The next day, at about lunch time, Samus Aran came into Kirby and Ness' room. Ness is extremely over joyed about this, but Kirby is scared.

"So, did you figure out who ate my Mushrooms?" Samus asked the boys.

"... Well, about that-" Kirby spat out.

"- It was Solid Snake!" Ness yelled.

A exclamation point came up above Kirby's Ponder Box. "How did you know it was me?!" Snake asked, as he came out of the box.

"Simple, really!" Ness said, "I saw your box everywhere since Samus' Mushrooms went missing! You were suspicious that someone was going to reveal you as the 'Mystery Nommer', but you didn't suspect a certain obscure videogame star such as myself to find your evil plan!"

"Also I helped." Kirby pointed out.

"Also Kirby helped!" Ness agreed.

"Well, in that case, I owe you an apology, Kirby!" Samus said to the Pink Puffball, "Now, Snake is about to be in trouble..."

Snake attempted to crawl into the air vent, but Samus grabbed him, dragging him out of the room.

"That was a happy ending!" Kirby cheered.

"How so?" Ness asked, "You found out Samus doesn't trust us, I stayed up all night helping you, the Mario Bros... Didn't do much, Samus lost her Mushrooms, Snake is getting beat up as we speak, and the Reader had to read a super boring story!"

"... Yeah, but we got a chapter for ourselves!" Kirby laughed. Ness started laughing too, and the screen faded to black, and random latin music played in the background for no reason...

* * *

** Thanks for reading! I promise it will get better/funnier. Feel free to tell me any plot you want to read or characters you want to star in a chapter!**


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